Tehran Touchdown


Filed Under Races 2010 on Apr 19 

Opting for a gray blazer instead of his trademark Members Only jacket, Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad boasted that his gay-free nation is so powerful no one would dare invade it.

Massive troop occupations are so 2003, so the chances of the US invading a third country are slim, but there are still concerns that the Iranians are expanding and fortifying facilities. Not cookie making facilities, no… facilities that may or may not be of use in developing nuclear weapons. Diplomacy (talking, not the cool board game) has been the preferred method of dealing with Iran up to this point, but there has been talk of using air strikes, covert operations and the cast of Jersey Shore to stymie Iran’s nuclear ambitions.

CNN has learned that the Pentagon is updating plans to strike these sites, should President Obama start remembering that he is the Commander-in-Chief and call for such an action. No word on whether such plans include picking up Israel’s dry cleaning, shining their shoes or watching their dog and being the “good guy friend” while they go out on steamy dates with Finland.