It has been our pleasure over the past three years to take the occasion of this blessed national holiday to award a person or persons with the PoliticalDerby Big Turkey Award. Our previous winners have been pairs, triplets, and large groups. But this year the arrogance, ignorance and idiocy that symbolize the Big Turkey Award have been found to land and bubble over in a single sole in such a way as to put our previous winners to shame.


It is our honor to announce the winner of the 4th Annual Big Turkey Award. Insert drum roll. And the winner is…envelope tearing…Mark Sanford!

The current and most likely future-x Governor of South Carolina captured the hearts and minds of the conservative movement. In the dark days of post November ’08 (y’know, before they got really dark!) many conservatives looked at Sanford as a future standard bearer. Instead of embracing their love, Mr. Sanford went looking for love in all the wrong places: South of the border! Well, the Argentinean boarder that is. Here Sanford found his soul mate.

Today, the LuvGov finds himself accused of violating 37 ethics violations. Among the numerous complaints are the charges that he four times extended trips to Brazil, at taxpayer expense, so he could salsa with his soul mate.

Sanford has brushed off repeated calls from his own party to step down and in the past month scored a political victory by helping land a Boeing Co. assembly plant that is expected to bring thousands of jobs to North Charleston. Meanwhile, the first lady and their four sons moved out of the governor’s mansion. While the Sanfords have said they were trying to reconcile, Jenny Sanford more recently has described the two as separated. She is writing a book about the experience.

Ay carumbba. Enough already. This goose is cooked.