Gallows Humor


Filed Under General on Mar 25 

Today you should really read IowaHawk’s Requiem for a Lightweight. It’s much better than any “gallows humor” that Obama has yet put forth. Usually gallows humor is limited to the guy standing on the trap door wearing a hangman’s noose. To me, Obama seems more like the guy standing at the release lever. Anyway, back to Iowa:

A stark dressing room in the underbelly of the White House, bathed in the dim yellow light of a 25-watt compact fluorescent bulb. The dingy walls are plastered with Shepard Fairey “HOPE” posters. Off stage is heard the cringing, muffled gasps of a stunned arena audience. Suddenly the door bursts open and enters BARACK “BAM BAM” OBAMA, former champion, unconscious on a stretcher carried by his handlers — cut man TWINKLETOES EMANUEL, manager PAPPY AXELROD, SPITBUCKET BEGALA and SPINDOC GREENBURG. His nose is bleeding profusely, his eyes nearly swollen shut, and his forehead is embossed with a reverse “BRUNSWICK” from an errant bowling ball. They are trailed into the room by a pack of concerned sportswriters as they place the stretcher on a stark table.

TWINKLETOES EMANUEL: Alright, alright! Give ’em some air, you mugs!

PAPPY AXELROD: Can you hear me, Champ?

BAM BAM: We would save enough money… uhh… we would… money save… the ones we are looking for…

PAPPY AXELROD (gently slapping Bam Bam’s face): Champ, Champ! Look at me! How many teleprompters am I holding up?

BAM BAM (giggling): Special Olympics… Heckuva job Timmy…

TWINKLETOES EMANUEL: Somebody get me the stimulus salts!

Read the whole thing.

He coulda been a contender…indeed.