Wow! Now we get to have a Car Czar – a concept about as stupid as it sounds. So what’s next? If Wisconsin is hit hard next year and Big Cheese is in trouble – do we get the Cheese Czar? If Ben and Jerry’s files for bankruptcy do we get the Ice Cream Czar? Do we just spin up a Czar for every occasion? Or do we learn our lesson when the car bailout proves to be a disaster and the Big Three are just as unviable this time next year?

What exactly is the Car Czar going to do anyways? Preside over the way the money is spent, like Paulson has presided over the investment banking bailout – meaning just sit there and watch the money be wasted?

I’ve got an idea for that Car Czar. Maybe he can start at the root of the problem. Like helping the Big Three build a vehicle that actually still runs after 100,000 miles. Or helping the UAW realize that operating an assembly line is not a $110K job, it’s really only a $50K job (provided you show up every day). Or how about eliminating that 12,000 man job bank for UAW employees who show up and do nothing? That would be a great start.

What we’re going to get, though, is a high paid official who will make some speeches about the dangers of CEO pay and how much the UAW has sacrificed to make the Big Three viable. Speaking of sacrifice, I hear UAW is ready to sacrifice anything to help the bailout deal get through Congress. That is, anything except pay, health care, vacation time, and pension plans. But they did say they were willing to consider working a full six hour day.

In the end, I’m afraid we will still have the same crappy cars, made by the same overpaid workers, while Americans drive the same Honda Civics to work. My Civic had over 300,000 miles on it and still got 33 MPG when I sold it to a teenager last year. I still see him driving it around the neighborhood from time to time.

When was the last time your Chevy broke the 300,000 mile mark?

Thought so.

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