Almost twenty-four hours has passed since my last sports/political metaphor, and now both Obama and Biden have given me an excuse for another one.

The dreams of an interior defensive lineman are haunted by two types of offensive plays. Both of these plays take advantage of a defensive lineman’s overwhelming desire to decapitate the quarterback and give – if all but for a split-second – the defensive lineman the illusion that he has a free shot at the ball carrier. He sees himself standing triumphant in the backfield having leveled said ball carrier before a stadium of screaming fans. One of these plays simply leaves the lineman standing in the backfield looking foolish, the other leaves him buried in the turf looking out the earhole of his helmet.

On a screen pass the offensive lineman let the defenders through as the quarterback drops back. Then, just before the defenders pound him into the turf the quarterback tosses the ball over the defenders to a waiting fullback who now has five linemen blocking downfield for him. All the defensive linemen can do is watch.

The trap block is by far the most dangerous offensive play for an unaware defensive lineman. Once the ball is snapped, the offensive lineman –usually a guard – in front of the defender pulls out and disappears. The defensive lineman sees a straight shot into the backfield and shoots through the gap ready to tackle the ball carrier or make a run at the quarterback. Usually, he stands up and looks around for his target only to be blindsided by another pulling guard who has had a five yard run at him. The ensuing collision sometimes draws not cheers but gasps from the crowd as the defensive lineman is pancake blocked into the turf. If you’ve ever seen a colossal defensive lineman getting up while picking grass from his helmet and readjusting it so he’s no longer looking out his earhole, its most likely he just got trap blocked. Don’t ask him where he’s at. He probably doesn’t know.

Politicians and pundits are sometimes like over zealous defensive linemen. They see what they perceive to be an opponents weakness or an otherwise exploitable opportunity and they charge right in before thinking about what might actually be happening around them. Sometimes the just end up looking foolish as their opponent scores a few points off their gaffes or misstatements. Other times, like in the case of Dan Rather, they end up getting blindsided by something everybody but them saw coming.

Over the past twenty-four hours, both Barack Obama and SlowJoe Biden have taken what they thought to be free shots at their opponents – taking advantage of what both Obama and Biden thought to be weaknesses.

SlowJoe was first out of the gate, taking a shot at the newest member of the Palin Clan. Way to go SlowJoe! Have fun picking the grass out of your facemask.

Obama, not to be upstaged by his running mate (whose selection he must no doubt regret by now), wasted no time in attempting to retake his “Change” mantle from Team McCain

Barack Obama just compared Stiletto Sarah to a pig. No matter what kind of denial or apology (assuming he tries that) he issues, the women of America will hear this and understand exactly what he was implying.

By doing this, Obama has just fallen victim one of the classic blunders. The most famous is never get involved in land war in Asia. Right behind that is the folly of asking a woman if she is pregnant until she is actually in the act of giving birth. Only slightly less dangerous is comparing a woman – any woman for that matter – to a pig. Lipstick and perfume not withstanding.

Obama isn’t just going to look foolish with this yet again UnTelePrompTered moment. He’s going to get his proverbial clock cleaned and stand there wondering why he’s looking out his earhole.

Comments