I’m thinking about starting a 24 hour cable channel featuring nothing but off-the-cuff Obama riffs unaided by any electronic performance enhancing devices. I’ll call it “Obama Unplugged”. Here’s the latest entry:

Yesterday (in yet another one of the places I used to call home) Obama stepped from behind his TelePrompTer equipped lectern in Springfield Missouri and announced that he had discovered the cure for America’s dependence on foreign oil. Actually, he’s discovered an alternative fuel that will make your car so fuel efficient its doubtful you’ll ever need to fill your gas tank again.

What’s this new fuel? Why I’m glad you asked. No, it’s not Mr. Fusion.  It’s not a hydrogen fuel cell. It’s not even one of those smart cars that are so small they wouldn’t survive a head on collision with my son’s bicycle.

No, dear reader, Obama has gone above and beyond our mere mortal abilities of propulsion. He’s discovered that using just plain old ordinary air will get America out of her current fuel crunch. No, I’m not making this up. Stop laughing and watch the video.

See? Now dagnabbit, I told you to stop laughing. You know the Obamessiah doesn’t take kindly to being laughed at or about. Now go out and make sure your tires are properly inflated or Obama will again be embarrassed by your not heeding his wise counsel.

Obama knows about as much regarding improving fuel economy as he does about particle physics. Powerline’s John Hinderaker has run the numbers – you know those cold hard things we like to call factual data – and has concluded

…it would take only 11,308 years of proper tire inflation to equal “all the oil that they’re talking about getting off drilling.”

In the process of business decision making, the accountants always want to know what the “break-even” point is – in other words, the point at which the new venture will have made enough money to pay back the original investment. No business in it’s right collective mind would ever enter or advocate a new venture who’s break even point was 11,000 years out.

Of course, maybe by then our great (to the power of 24 or so) grandchildren will be flying around in cars powered by Mr. Fusion.

Comments

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  • http://www.politicalderby.com/ Jason Wright, Editor

    “Hi, I’m Billy Mays! Did you know that by inflating your tires you could save a bazillion dollars in fuel? Call now for my insider tip!!”

    Seriously, this is one of the funniest (unintentional) clips I’ve ever seen. Does this look like a man who should driving our energy policy? Setting the economic agenda?

    “In just 22 seconds you’ll learn the incredible energy saving tip that could save us a fortune!!”

  • ShawnN

    OFF TOPIC:

    Are the new VP rankings coming out before or after the candidates name their running mates?

    Just curious. The suspense is killing me.

    • http://www.politicalderby.com/ Jason Wright, Editor

      Every time I write a draft someone drops out! It’s maddening. They’re coming, promise…

  • JE

    “And if everyone will just keep their car washed and waxed, the improvement in aerodynamics will save even more! When i am president everyone gets Friday off to wax your car and inflate your tires! Now that is change we can believe in!”

  • Alaina

    You know what else… if you drive 60 or below and coast to a stop instead of using your breaks, it might take only 10,000 years.

    Seriously… they should really put that into an ad.

  • kristen

    This goes to show the kind of audience he is always addressing: idiots that have never learned the concept of keeping one’s tires inflated.

    Obama is giving McCain so much material for political ads……

  • JE

    That clip is taken out of context! How dare they make Obama look so stupid.
    What he meant is that properly inflated tires make it easier for you to get out and push after he restricts you to 20 gallons of gas per month.
    (Thats as big a piece of pie as you need)

    • RedstateEddio

      But wait! That’s not all! This doubles as Obama’s “get America fit” campaign to reduce obesity.

      Just brilliant!

      • JE

        Which will correct the “health care crisis”. The lack of emissions by the motor no longer running helps the environment. And since we are saving fuel we will no longer need these “wars for oil” and we will have world peace. One policy and all our problems are solved! Truly he is the promised one! All hail the obamessiah!

  • RedstateEddio

    I think I’ve recovered. I’m feeling much better now…

    The “B” now stands for Bikes and Buses, as in the economy grinding to a halt as we get suffocated out of a diminishing oil supply.

    This clip could do serious damage to the Oba-wan: out of touch, not dealing with facts/reality, proposing idiot ideas untenable to the economy while it sounds cute.

    The longer Obama continues to refuse any increased oil prodiction options (like OS drilling), the more he paints himself into a corner. If McCain keeps hammering away on that point, people will shift.

    I can dream of a better tomorrow in America, but I have to pay the bills today.

  • Mike

    This guy is a joke, how come in his last advertisment it ended with Barack Obama President. not For President but President.

    • David

      Agree!

  • RedstateEddio

    Oh. My. Goodness.

    cannot… type… having… brain aneurism… over idiocy… expressed (and believed!)…in that video…

  • Eric

    “Inflate Here. Inflate Now. Pay more or less the same.”