I’m not a psychologist nor am I a psychiatrist but despite the fear Tom Cruise might come do a one-half gainer on my couch I’ll take a risk and play one here on the web.

There is much debate in the head shrinker community regarding the existence of Repressed Memory Syndrome. The nuts and bolts on this issue is the mind finds something so horrible it represses the memory thereof so that it can continue to function. Many people have repressed memories. Mine usually center on traumatic events like the opening of my 401K statements.

Memory is a tricky thing. Everybody has stories that get better every time it gets told – for example Uncle Buck’s “fish tales”. The fish grows several inches with each telling. This is fine for fish tales – not so much with events to which there are witnesses, especially the unblinking eye of a CBS camera lens.

Hillary Clinton is currently taking fire from both sides for her “misstatement” about her experiences during a trip to Bosnia in 1996. It seems that, despite her recollections, there was no sniper fire or other dangers during her very short visit to the war torn country. In fact, the Air Force pilot in command of the C-17 on which Her (Less Than) Inevitableness rode said there was “not even a bumblebee” flying when they landed. So much for having to “run to the cars”.

I’ve decided to label this malady as Virtual Memory Syndrome. While it’s not clear as to whether or not it is genetic, it does appear to be transmissible via close contact with another victim. Some here will remember Bill Clinton’s 1996 recollection of black churches being torched when he was a boy in Arkansas. The only problem was the only place those churches were burned was in Bill’s memory. Evidently even a former Clinton (sorry excuse for) Administration member (and current VP contender) suffers from this same syndrome.

When a computer has memory problems, the solution is to either add more RAM or swap out the hard drive. I’m not sure how this could be accomplished with a presidential candidate. Frankly, I’m not sure there’s enough RAM on the market to solve Hillary’s Virtual Memory Syndrome.

Here endeth the lesson.

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